sometimes .. sometimes .
i feel ..

i dontknow why .
i dontknow wads wrong with me again .
mum said that dad will be bringing me out to eat on sunday
to celebrate my early birthday .
i dontwant , its not what i want . i ...
i told michelle today , i wasnt really expecting my birthday to come.
i dontknow why . i got this very bad feeling ..
its very very different from last year.
when that special day of mine to come
, i guess i will not feel the joy in me like last year anymore .
so let this birthday to be an unhappy birthday (:
i dontknow why i felt so down .
maybe moodswings .
all i want is A1s for my subjects.
MICHELLE SAID THAT MY EXPECTATIONS ARE HIGH -.-

erms, maybe from next week monday till the end of examination , i wont be online. yaaa , & maybe will online and blog only on my birthday :D

today was like so fun in class (: hahaa ,

tml is ENGLISH test . hais , i must pass. no more failings , LIMIN (: buck up ! i need tha motivation , please.

i wish i wish , i can pass all my subjects.

have to rush my F&N work . hais , fucks life. so many things need to do . finish le must go revise . my dearrr pure geog.

ytd i met a despo -.- can u believe it ? within two days , he can ask for it . if im dumb , i will accept. but im not ! he is crazy and im not . hahs : D weird people always do weird things . ouhhh , i fail my english again . duhs , i guess i must study the dictionary fer better vocabulary to use . HAIS .

this friday , will be my first paper which is english . wish me good luck : D i hope i can do it , i hope i can finally pass my english . just like my maths . hais , PLEASE .

thanks christine uh : D
i think this is the first time i got so depress.
i still feel ... super duper upset. hais

unloved lost her confidence again! HOW ?!
she wants to score A1 for all her subjects .

is it because my expectation for myself is too high .
or ,
its normal ?

hais . even a thousand words cant describe how im feeling now .

&&
i received the letter to make IC . wees ! i can work le lahs !

just a short post fer today & off to a nap later. wake up & study ss. duhs , im in a low spirit. ahhs , cause of my physics class test. i think im going to flunk it . but my chemi class test results somehow cheer me up also . A1 for tha first time. so today mood quite weird uhs . half upset , half happy : x hais , i dontknow why i cant score for physics. HAIS

thenthen , chinese lesson . zhang lao shi angry with kelvin & ronnie. so , she scold scold lors. then must do tha yi lun wen paper then can be release. dui bu qi , lao shi ! : D mug hard , people.

please help me with my physics ~ hais . ): i feel so so so soooo sad . i think im going to score the lowest mark in the class. why cant i just simply understand tha topic and do all the questions ?! stupidd. HAIS HAIS HAIS. i dont want to pull down my chemistry marks . HAIS HAIS HAIS .

how ?
baddd mooooooodddddd .


unloved, i said .

went to find jeanie just now . afternoon nahs : D wenta nat house downstair , cause stupid jeanie want take her books so accompanied her ! then after that wenta plaza , buy some stuffs. eat my dinner (: went home .

ouhs , i hate my damn computer. is like so damn slow , i felt like hitting it till it really spoilts. im finding panda icons ^^ who have it ? give meeee. hahaa , doing homework later. kind of lazy lahs , but no choice. i didn bring back my F&N book too. duhs -.- how to do my coursework. ahhh , ferget it .

i think my blog is kind of weird -.- i dontknow ,

unloved

bu zhi dao why suddenly i so emotional. xiang alot alot nahs . im not gonna to direct anyone here :D so rest assured that im not talking bout U ! sometimes i've been thinking what i want & how much do i understand myself. i will go like , hey i dont wish to know myself . i will always look at the negative side because i know i wont have a happy ending like everyone does. can you see how much i hate myself ?
FUCKS LIES.

people , cherish everything you have now uhs :D bbefore it all slips off from you . by that time , u will be crying like shits . & nobody will really cares bout you . even if they do care , they wont know how hurt you are feeling . NO , they cant. sometimes its not really great to rake up tha past anymore , u will look back and laugh at yrself. silly huhs ? let go of everything that does not belong to you .

is this something in this world called everlasting ?

i dontknow why i felt such a way . i will look at myself infront of a mirror and say , ' ugly bitch , you deserve it . ' i think i will always get so suay . hahs ! bytheway , its great to be loved ! really really so xinfu , ohkays . i get over to those things already. hold on with yr relationship if u have one , dont say break up this two words so easily. give in & understanding , is tha only thing you must have to get a stable relationship . i dontwant to see my closest friends ending up in a bad state, you know ^^ nvr give up . its doesnt means that tha person dun cherish u and in the end u do tha same too .

he will always be my pain .

limin , stop tha craps -.- hahaa , michelle kuku miss MEMEME : D imissyoo too . mum still remember that my bday is coming . quite happy lahs . but i wanted to have my nokia6111 as my bday present. budden i know she cant afford it lahs . its alot of money . so ferget it ,dont put too much hope . hahaa :D nvm , after eoy , i will go and work. earn money , buy that phone && no one should snatch with me to buy that prettaye phone . maybe? hais ):

hahaa , adults always lie to children .

today slept alot . hahaa , msged with ian just now. nice guy :D i knew him through friendster ^^ lols , kills my boredom. lalas : x homework later ? STUDY lah , limin . byebye , stupid blog.


unloved , i said.

mmm , morning :D . just now chat with some people in msn . what to do ners ? hais , let it be bahs . mummy sick lers , so i wont be going out today ? i notsure also , im going to starve myself till die uhs . ytd wenta pasar malam with jeanie & her bro. bought my adidas bag (: quite nice lahs . i dontknow why i like it so much when i first saw it. saw my school sec2 de girls. chio : D

i was feeling so vexed today . eoy is approaching already , next week lahs . i must pass all my subjects . pleaseeee (: hais , im having gastric pain again ~ its damn pain . ahhhh .

forgot to bring my F&N book home . i have lotsa of homework . doing it all at night . monday study fer ss . lalas :D

unloved

today was so tiring :D but i've got lots of fun with my guides friends. wenta cycle at east coast park . de-stress , you know : x hahaa ,somehow i love today lahh. school was ohkay , mr singh nvr come again. lalas . quite good lahs , LOLS .

later going to pasar malam with jeanie at bangkit. im slacking (:
today is for me & cheryl <3

i miss my winnie (:

unloved.

im in a bad mood now ): very very bad mood. & i dontknow why . please dun irritate me fer tha time being .. brrr

min :D

SCREAM WITH ME ! ahhh : D hahaa , im so so so happy because i FINALLY pass my maths . like wow , finally can ?! i broke the curse of failing maths forever . lols , although its like just pass by six marks. the feeling is damn shiok lahs : D today is 20th & is the date for me & christine. lala :D today damn high uhs .

im so sleepy now because i only slept for five hours ytd. cause i spent hours studying ss & chemistry . chemistry test , im ohkay with it lahs. ss , teacher nvr come. liddat also good ouhs , i can have much time to study and understand the topic. E.O.Y is coming & im still lacking behind. ahhh , buck up ! buck up on my studies now !

wanted to do a new blogskin. sians ,
BE ORIGINAL .

i want i want playboy stuffs ^^

unloved

whats today's date huhs ?

dedication to my dearrr dearrr christine .
hahaaa , iloveyou lahs . christine : D
happy 15th birthday . may u last long with SHARK orhs.
hehs , just like wad the card said . thanks for every single thing you did for us in this three years. & i really appreciate it alot. i'll definitely cherish this friendship to bits and pieces. hope ya like tha present & be really very happy today. today is yr birthday & how can u cry this morning because u are touched huhs ! cannot lahs . SMILE ehs : D cyas tml !

okays . so morning , we intend to give christine a surprise . && i told winnie to tell christine that im late & ask her to wait for me downstairs. at first we bought her a sunblock lotion cause she sunburn mahs ! hahaa , so when i reached first floor . i asked her to come inside tha lift & said to her , happy birthday , & hugged her (: gave her tha present. hehs ! bytheway * i shall forget tha date 9th october . LOLS

after that wenta eat breakfast at greenridge . then faster go school lorhs. school was ohkay lahs . physics , i think i abit cannot understand . & tml theres a math test. please pray that i will pass uhs . chinese results got back . scored A1 . like finally lahs . but maybe because tha paper is easy .. mmm , but i still felt elated. weees !

F&N , teacher like crazy lahs . suddenly shout at us . ouhs , then after that she calm down then ohkay le. maybe doing my F&N research later , try to complete it by next week. guides is going to cycle at dontknow where lahs. but not confirm yet , is around exam corner. what a date ! >.< hais , i have alot of works need to do .

; chinese ying yong wen.
; english compo
; maths revision
; F&N research
; revise physics , social studies & chemistry.

SEE ! so many ~ hais . hais . hais.... fucks life.
i dont want i dont want & i DONTWANT to retain. please.

ouhs , & im so pissed off today by my history marks. i wrote the wrong answer at the wrong question. if not i can pass ? maybe ? hais , what should i do to improve my studies lahh. stress eh .

mmm , after school . they wenta my house & study & played games . like stupid lahs . hahaaa , tml study at home ! i promise ^^


unloved.

AHHHH , i didn mean anything bout what i said lahs . really , alright . hais ...

so i was chatting with mark on msn . then he kept asking me to relax . thanks uh (: hais , i dontknow lahs . felt quite down lahs . i mean , im not in a high spirits also . hais

didn went out out today . maybe tml ? yups , jeanie want go bugis buy her shoe. yupps , hais . whole day stayed at home study chemistry abit. acids , bases and salts . know a little bit more lers. actually , quite easy lahs . hahaa : x i dontknow why i cant get it last time. suppose got go out today de . cause winnie wanna go out to eat lunch , she msged me but i was sleeping . so i didn reply . when i woke up , i called her , but end up she was sleeping. damn stupid . hahaa , ohkay lahs . i go revise or maybe do my F&N lers.


ouhs , i miss kuku michelle & my lovely winnie : D
where is jeanie zibi ?

loves ,

MIN !

fucks f&n . stress lahs , i going to cry soon : x . hais , hais , hais ... sickening coursework . driving me crazy soon . theres still alot of them i need to do . HAIS , how lahs. ahhhhhh , by next week must hand in leh.

school was ohkay.

kuku michelle love me : D
wahhaaa .
paiseh lahs today : x
next time pei u k.

min.

BUSY :D
but mmm , spend some time blogging uhs.
doing my F&N coursework nors.
alot of things must type out.
hais , fan uhs !!
no choice lors. skipped guide today .
went back home & did my things.

im so tired lahhh .
exams are coming & im so afraid that i'll retain.
because my english are atrocious.
ahhh , FAN lahhh.
i'll be studying from this week onwards.

congrats to christine & her shark.
one month ouhs (: LASTTTT ah !


MIN

mum said that i should be mentally prepared.
because grandpa was admitted to the hospital yesterday.
it was tha second time already
& no one dare to ask him go for operation.
hais , grandma was like normal bahs.
budden mum said that she cant sleep after hearing tha news.
& she even asked me whether i have white tshirt anot.
hais... i was like stunned .
but theres nothing i can do other than praying for grandpa.
外公, 你要坚强 !
im worried and.... hais.

; _______

school reopens (: happy to see all my friends. love love ! morning wenta eat breakfast . after that , reached school . wenta locker & i cant recognize sulastri . hahs , im sorry ! today was quite boring lahs , but maths lesson kept me awake . & it rains . so i kept writing on my paper . 外公, 你要坚强 ! 外公, 你要坚强 ! ~

hais , lessons ended . didn go for maths nahs . wenta plaza with girlfriends , mark & leslie. fucks dulan with leslie lahs ! nvm , ferget it .

the date , 11th is taken !
ME & JOANNE [ my da er duo ] :D
ME & MICH YEO [ loveeeee ! ] (:

_____

ouhs , im attached ! really :D
i superrr loveeeeeeee ~ ^^

min .

for a moment uhs , i felt that tha friends around me are like so great lahs . make me happy & etc. really do cheer me up alot today (:

i was chatting with andrew : D && he asked me to send regards to winnie & jeanie for him . lols ,


MIN !

ru guo ...


unloved.

uhhhs ! im back from bugis. ouhhs , & i bought same shoe with my laogong , winnie : D went out alone with her today . then then , suppose want go watch movie de . but end up , dont have lorhs. bought our shoes ler , wenta take neoprints (: hehs. & i now declare that im totally broke. -.- ke lian de wo.

think tml will be studying bahs .
HAIS.

in the mrt , its all those things .


unloved.

didn hang out with them today . so out of boredom , i wenta watch wei xiao pasta in youtube . not bad uhs (: thenthen liddat lorhs . i suddenly miss my mum ^^ lols .

say bye to limin : x
ferever `

min

try this :D

http://cn.wu123.com/1225/www/

my results ;
在你心中 XX 占据着最重要的位置，你对 XX 的感觉用 salahio 这首歌来形容再好不过了。你相信这是上天安排的缘分，因为你深深的爱着 XX 。 对于 ZZ ，也许是宿命吧，虽然你也喜欢 ZZ，但是你们注定不可能在一起，就象 mei tian mei tian 中唱的一样。

jeanie 是最关心你的人，而 michelle 是最了解你的人，你们两个在一起会彼此有知己的感觉。 winnie 是你的幸运星，也许会给你带来好运气的哦~!~!~!

* this is what i tried after reading rebecca blog. of course tha XX & ZZ is someone's name lahs . but stupid people also wont write tha name out . ouhs , try it . it can be quite real . however , some of the words are same butt quite meaningful lorhs. er xin de michelle ! !

____

i've so many pictures for today . wenta starbucks & study . didn study much nahs . they were helping with my handphone & then we did some questions of maths . ouhh , i teached them ! LOLS , i think i'll be studying again tml . winnie go find mark . kuku , nvr come & find me . misses * so left tha three of us . we were like so crazy . && i talk to myself looking at the mirror. asking myself alot of whys . AHH

a happy day !

CRAZY .
say hellos to tha photos for today! hees XD


oreo cheescake : D BEFORE


i sit , i stand , i FALL ~ (:
stupid twists ^^ AFTER !


that UGLY currypuff =x


my prettaye phone (:


UGLY MEE & jeanie


MEE (: starbucks <3s


my MICHELLE yeo :D lols , dont kill me ahs.


MEMEME again (:
they took it quite long ago..


jeanie , ME , michelle.
where is my dear WINNIE ?


its quite blur .. BUT
you can see a crazy girl twisting uhs .
that girl is JEANIE CHONG :D



unloved.

going to plaza to study later , i guess (: i wanna study study study ! i wish i really could .. spend hours studying there . hahaa , im bored .

its been like very long i didn go out & shop lers . hais , ke lian de wo .

ouhs , you = him ! ni hen fan ! hen fan ! hen fan lahs ! everyday call call if not msg me . AHHHHH ! fan si wo lers . can i kill you ? sometimes u make to be my bestest friend , sometimes u just drive me to nuts. FAN SI WO ~ just treat it that i dont know how to appreciate you , DUHS !


unloved loves MIN !

loves ! i think today will be bored. hais , nvm . read michelle's blog just now . then suddenly , i think of my dream ytd ytd night . hahs ,damn stupid lah... sometimes what i dream will happen in real life. tha dream was like ... i cut my veins & then blood flows out . lols :D that morning , i woke up & the first thing i did was look at my left hand . & phew .... hahas , stupid sia.

hao xiang si ouhs ! >.<


爱不到你 , 所以祝福你. 心里总是感到空虚, 好像有一个很大很大的洞. 一个不能用友谊疗那些受过伤的心.爱过了, 眼泪也该停了..

salahio 爱的理由 , 不会有错 .
我的爱走了..

unloved !

msn nick , hao duo ren fang wu gui ... & i know why nahs . sadded ):

im watching , wo men jie hun ba ! , later. ouhs , & i love today because i wasnt bored . hahaa , pon maths =x so wenta plaza with girlfriends , mark & leslie to eat in mac . then then , it rains ! i was feeling so .. vexed . hais , nvm :D

while waiting for the rain to stop , we settled down at starbucks drinking coffee . nicenice. awhile later , the rain stopped & they all went to my house . we had some sort of " pillow " fight . lame sia . hahaa , & i kept hitting mark . i feel so :D . thanks , mark ! lols , watch tv . chitchat . stupid leslie wanted to open my room's door. of course , i wont allow him ! hehs ^^

around four plus , took lrt to fajar with mich & jeanie . mark & winnie walked there but end up met at jelapang lrt . ouhs , i saw jennis (: she is still so sweet like that time at esplanade. smile smile with me :D she is with her bf & friend bahs . we wenta rent vcds & i went home .

ZINC ; ps : michelle ! you know what it mean huhs ? hehs :D

101112
unloved loves unloved !

dead ! just now rainfall >.< cause i wrote something .. hais , i feel so down right now . nvm , at least there is people chatting with me on msn . thanks thanks :D ahhh ! scream with me ; im all alone at home now . i feel so ... hais . hais , girlfriends all dontknow fly where le. sian si wo lers . hais hais hais ... ):

its raining soon . where are they ? work work work lorhs ! now kor came back le . hais , but i just felt the same . so bored lahs . tml going to school again . i think i alone bahs . yups , independent ! tml sure sians de. from 10-12 english , 1-3 maths . dying , dying ... today maths also sian halfs le .. but at least some can do nahs. quite happy nors :D but i hate trigo . maths can kill me .

& i was told bout how much i got for oral . i aim to get higher marks cause it can help to pull up my written work marks . mmm , nvm nahs. i did my best (: yups .

before i forget ;
happy 15th birthday to kunda :D


im dying , bored to death .
this world is so cold ...


unloved.

off to school :D
miss me ! hahs

unloved.

re-update
_____

back again !
because of razis , im like damn stupid & crazy
laughing at my computer alone .
& got scolded by my mum . lols
no steamboat tml !
lalalaaa xD

____

hellos :D

有时侯觉得这个世界好现实 !
从来也不回头 >.<
死吧 ! ~
好傻 , 好傻 , 好傻 ..

ahhhs ! im going back to school alone tml . ohkay , must be independent . damn winnie keep force me go eat her steamboat tml after remedial . awww :D ke lian wo uhs. your monthsary must spend only with your love !

im paranoid . hais , whatever ):

wo xiang tong lers .


unloved.

song title :
i think i - ; [ i love the lyrics :D ]

I refused to believe that it could be so,
there's no way that I'm in love with you,
I lied to myself that it's just a petty jealousy,
that I must be feeling lonely, but I cannot hide it anymore.

I think I love you
But it must be so, Cause I miss you
without you,
I cannot do anything,
and you are always on my mind,
so seeing this, it must be,
I was unaware,
but now I can see that
your presence have delved deeply into my heart.

We are not meant for each other,
and being friends is the best thing for us,
there isn't a single thing we have in common,
so I claimed there's no way we can be lovers,
but I don't want to make excuses anymore.

I think I love you
But it must be so,
Cause I miss you without you,
I cannot do anything,
and you are always on my mind,
so seeing this, it must be,
I was unaware,
but now I can see that
your presence have delved deeply into my heart.

why didn't I know that it was you,
why couldn't I see it when it was right in front of me,
it was beside me all along,
but only now can I see love.

I think I love you
But it must be so,
Cause I miss you without you,
I cannot do anything,
and you are always on my mind,
so seeing this, it must be,
I was unaware,
but now I can see that
your presence have delved deeply into my heart.

_____

im happy happy to say that my comp is fixed. i doubt so -.- ohkays , i just hope that it wont spoil again . hahaa :D so im back to post again . holidays are boring .. but i love holidays because i can sleep late and i did . xD good uhs .

wed ... saw karen ! chit-chat with her nors at senja grand :D friday - hugged my baobei gan-mei :D renytta ! i miss her lots . mmm , didn go back to westview . plain lazy . i went home straight (:

&& something that i just dont get it why is that when im sleeping , alot of people loves to call my handphone . for example ; leslie pek ! kurt kor ! & even mum & er kor. lalaaa (: nvm , at least i still get enough sleep . lols ! i think im having fever soon (: because i felt so warm & unwell . duhh , not the first time . but no to medicines . today , im having steamboat with my family :D heee .

i think i will be revising my work later . bored bored bored :D ouhhh , i chatted with jeanie today in msn (: lovees lahs . hahaa , dont worry ohkay . we will still be close as ever. && jiayou hors .


unloved.